I lost a friend last weekend.
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The world seems a little heavier now.
Shock, disbelief, regrets, and questions have been coming to my head since.
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The pain in the chest. Tears choking in my throat that sometimes escape, silently rolling. A bit like he went. Without saying a word.
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He is a special dude, and if you had met him, you would call him a friend as well.
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He was the embodiment of nature. He inspired me and influenced me as much as nature does.
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His cheeky smile was the summer breeze when you rest under a tree. Him playing the guitar was the smell of the campfire in the wind, warm, approachable, and relaxing.
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But he was also the stern wind of the high mountains. There was a strength in him, coming from his many experiences in life, difficult to explain. Sometimes it felt like being in the presence of a gigantic peak, wise, majestic and reminding you of how small we are in front of the sheer beauty of Nature.
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He was everyone's cheerleader.
Any idea you had, he would convince you it was a great idea. He would push you out of your head, of your comfort zone, in a fun, lighthearted way.
𝑆𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑠 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑠𝑡𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑑, 𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑛𝑜𝑤.
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He had many positive qualities. And probably many negative ones as well.
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Like the complete inability to follow time, or wash the teacups (ℎ𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑜 𝑇𝑖𝑚𝑚𝑖𝑒𝑠), or let the elbow rest after I was trying to fix it. His smile would have taken him out of jail, and I am sure he knew it.
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He was like that. And I am grateful for the time spent together.
And the memories I will have forever.
Let alone the knots he taught me to tie. I didn't know what a double 8 was, and he thought it was good to show me all the knots to pull out someone from a crevasse because "you never know". 𝑀𝑎𝑦𝑏𝑒 𝐼 𝑔𝑜 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑓𝑖𝑠ℎ 𝑎 𝑏𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑠 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑢𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑟𝑜𝑝𝑒, 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑓𝑢𝑛.
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The world has lost a sparkle, but I know he has inspired many and his stories will be told many more times.
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And I am grateful for the intensity of the feelings I am feeling these days. The grief and the gratitude. The sadness and the waves of laughter. The duality of this experience.
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𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐤, 𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐬, 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟.
𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 "𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐲", "𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬, 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭".
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Then something happens and suddenly your schedule doesn't have sense anymore.
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You are reminded of the beauty and the sheer power of connections and friendships and people around you. Not tomorrow, not in a month, but at this present moment.
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𝐒𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥, 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐭.
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I won't focus on the regrets I might have, but I will make sure to cherish the people I have around me.
Because really, you never know. And the risk of being too late is there.
